Sunday, August 8, 2010

To Have and To Hold

Olin and I are quickly coming up on 2 years of marriage. I know we are still considered newlyweds to some, and there are times when we still feel like newlyweds, but we have faced many trials during these two short years. Amazingly, never wavering in our commitment or love for each other. I will admit that I look back at those and realize how blessed I am to be in a marriage where I don't have to wonder how secure I can be. I know he is here for the long haul. And I think I have shown him I am as well. I was reading a book the other day and came upon this. I felt like it deserved to be shared and I felt it was very representative of my marriage at this place we are at-and probably always will be.

"A Marriage"

You are holding up a ceiling with both arms. It is very heavy, but you must hold it up, or else it will fall down on you. Your arms are tired, terribly tired, and, as the day goes on, it feels as if either your arms or the ceiling will soon collapse.

But then, unexpectedly, something wonderful happens. Someone, a man or a woman, walks into the room and holds their arms up to the ceiling beside you. So you finally get to take down your arms. You feel the relief of respite, the blood flowing back to your fingers and arms. And when your partner's arms tire, you hold up your own to relieve him again.

And it can go on like this for many years without the house falling.

-Michael C. Blumenthal

As a person that was fiercly independent, and carried the weight of a lot of things on my shoulders for many years, this truly does represent what Olin did for me. I can't put into words (without sounding mushier than I already do) what a relief it is now to know that whatever happens or comes along, I AM NOT DEALING WITH IT ALONE. It is the most amazing feeling in the world! And the fact that he knows just when to put his arms back up? Icing on my cake. It is nice to know that no matter what we face or what tries to come between us, that we are a house that stands and holds together. With God in the middle of us, we are stronger than the enemy could ever be.

Olin-Thank you for coming to help me hold up the ceiling. I look forward to holding that ceiling with you for the next 50 years. Our arms may tire, but we will just take shorter turns. Know that there is nobody that I would rather be looking at while I am holding it. I love more ways than you could ever know.

But I Promise I'm Witty!

I consider myself a sharp, witty girl. Most of the time. I assumed when I started writing this blog that it would be full of humor and sarcasm...and sometimes it is. However, lately I have been in a serious post mood and I can't seem to get out of it. I know that it is directly relational with everything that is going on with my life right now. I guess the reason for me writing this is to let you guys know that the witty wiggins will come back soon....Hopefully. Until then, please enjoy the serious posts...because there are sure to be a few more as I am waiting to see how God works this all out in our lives!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

And now...A List

1. I am not going to even introduce the blog post before I start the list. It is item number 1. There are many little things to say and no cohesive blog post to say them in.

2. After helping people move last night and not stopping until 7am this morning, I don't have many coherent thoughts going on in my brain right now. The wee one is entertaining himself today. (Don't fret-he is 11 so he is more than capable.)

3. It is hard for me to even take a nap still. Even though he knows the rules of not answering the door or going outside and to come get me and daddy if he needs something...and not to use the stove but he can use the still makes me nervous. After being up for more than 24 hours I was only able to take a 3 hour nap...most of which he was sleeping for as well. Does this make me a freak? I need to let him have a little responsibility!

4. I am on the phone now and I cannot process a phone conversation and typing. My brain isn't functioning that quick today. I promise to try to lighten things up around here. All of my blogs have been serious. They will probably continue to be that way for a while but I promise that, like Justin, I'm bringing humor back. Soon my blogger friends, soon. (I just typed blogger as blooger...You are all my blooger friends. Doesn't that make you feel loved?)

Until next time peeps....

Sunday, August 1, 2010

The Men In My Life

The other week I was sitting in church and as my husband reached for my hand it hit me. Life is good. In the every day running of life, I tend to get bogged down and look for the next thing that I am expecting God to make happen. I miss out on what He has given me now.

I wasn't only sitting beside fabulous friends to my left, but beside me I had my husband and the wee 11 year old. Since I have found this church, I literally will be driving down the road at times and day dream about how wonderful it would be to have my earthly father go to church with me. Just one time. When I was a little girl and lived in Louisiana, I was baptized at 11 years old. I remember constantly peeking out from the doors at the front of the sanctuary and asking friends if my dad had came. He promised he would, and he did show up. Not only was the baptism the highlight of the night, but my dad was there to watch and support me. For a little girl that doesn't have that support from her dad, this was momentous. This is the only time that my dad has ever attended church with me. Fast forward a bunch of years and I still want that. He doesn't live near me so I am not peeking out the door wondering if he will show up, but I wonder how amazing it would be for him to attend Elevation. I wonder if it would rock his world like it has mine. I wonder if the message that he would hear would be the one that changed his life. I wonder if he realizes that if he were to come to accept Christ as his Saviour, that would be the greatest gift he could ever give me.

When I was sitting beside my husband in church the other day, I began to realize that it is ok to pray for a better life for my father. It is ok that I am sometimes sad that I didn't have a prominent male role model in my life growing up. However, at the same time I need to remember that He is already in my tomorrow. He is my portion. He makes sure I have exactly what I need. When my husband reached for my hand during worship, I realized I have my protector, best friend, provider, lover, help mate, cheerleader, and soul mate. What I didn't get from my earthly father growing up, my heavenly Father provided (even though I couldn't see it.) What I missed by not having men in my life growing up, He cultivated in Olin to provide that for me with a side helping of soul mate. And when I look next to my husband to the 11 year old, I am reminded that He has given Olin and I a chance to further His kingdom. He trusts me with part of that job. He trusts me to raise Seth to be a man that is unlike my earthly father.

When I look back at childhood now and get a little sad about not having dad around, I look beside of me in church, or in the bed, or around the house and I see the two men in my life. And I am reminded that even then, He was shaping me to be what I needed to be to deserve these two. I am reminded that He is, and always has been, in my tomorrows. His portion is enough. His portion is more than I could ever dream for myself.

And I am reminded that I am very thankful for that.